I loved the attachment article. I have already read it three times! This article gave me the confidence that what I have been doing with my nine-month-old son is right! And I don’t need to feel belittled by others when they say I am “spoiling” him. I liked Peggy’s column (“Case Closed: Breast Is Best”), “Attachment Theory in Everyday Life,” and the letters, especially the concerns and answers about the cosleeping article (“The Science of Shared Sleep,” January–February 2009). “Attachment Theory in Everyday Life” was amazing. Once again, Mothering delivered just what I needed at the time I needed it. I have a five-month-old, and have been going through a bit of a crisis of confidence in attachment parenting. I went back and read [about] the scientific studies supporting
it in The Fussy Baby Book [by William Sears, MD, and Martha Sears, RN; Little, Brown and Company, 1996], and then this article arrived. It helped me remember why I chose to parent this way in the first place. My husband and I read [“Attachment Theory in Everyday Life” ] out loud together and loved it. Days later, we are still having meaningful, intense conversations based on what we read. We both appreciate the content and are a;rmed in our beliefs about attachment parenting. “Attachment Theory in Everyday Life,” by Lauren Lindsey Porter, really spoke to me. I don’t always seem to fulfill what I see as the role of the attachment parent. Frustration, little sleep, or a long day can take a toll on my sensitivity and definitely play a role in my responsiveness. Reading the article struck a chord, and reminded me
that every time I respond to my daughter, or fail to, I a;ect her in more than just that moment.
My daughter is likely just as frustrated with me as I am with her, and I am now reminding myself that, when we have a tough part of the day, and things just don’t seem to be running smoothly, I truly need to step back and try to understand things from her perspective.
“Attachment Theory in Everyday Life” rea;rmed the principles I’m already committed to as a parent, and provided evidence for them. I definitely think it’s true that you can give only what you’ve been given, or what you’ve given yourself through emotional healing. I only wish that the article had given some clues as to how attachment can be repaired when the parent, due to his or her own upbringing, has made mistakes!
Let us know what you like in this issue and discuss the articles with other readers. Go to our survey at www.mothering.com/survey and weigh in.
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